Vomitrocious and Inconsiderate Actions.

I live in a condo building with lots of young professionals and a few older single people, but all in all, a solid, friendly crowd of neighbors. That is, until early one weekday morning (probably around 2am on a Monday night) when I wake up to my entire bedroom shaking. Like I legitimately jumped up out of bed, thought the world was ending and was scared for my life. I had no idea what the noise was until I finally heard a girl moaning in the background….

…And then I realized that my neighbor’s headboard is actually physically against my bedroom wall. So his late night ‘activities’ translate into an earthquake slash auditory pornographic experience in my bedroom during an hour when I’d rather not be awake.

So then it happened again the next week on a Tuesday night. And the following week on a Monday night again. And then it stopped for a little while… until yesterday (Tuesday) morning at 3:18 AM.

First, WHY must this guy’s ‘activities’ all take place from Monday through Wednesday nights post 2AM?! Can we get him some normal hours for this endeavor? Maybe 10-11pm,  like the rest of the world? I’ve created this mental image of him from his headboard-shaking experiences (I’ve actually never seen him) and my guess is that he just brings home random girls after his Monday-Wednesday bartending job (he obviously, is not a great bartender due to his off-peak work schedule, but must make up for the downside, by his effort in the bedroom).

Anyway, yesterday was the last straw. I was pretty angry because I was tired and had a long day, plus I just started a new job that I need to now be conscious for.. and the girl that he was with must have thought she was starring in a pornography (or maybe she was… who knows what goes on in other people’s apartments) because the noises that were coming out of her were way over-acted and obnoxious (and unnecessary for me to listen to). I was about to kick down their front door and punch them both in their faces (Again, I do not condone violence), but instead I banged on the wall loudly back, to which they both started laughing, and continued their activities.

The next time I see him (or maybe it’s a her), a fight may or may not ensue. I will keep you all updated.

(P.S. – I am not jealous.)